Adoption Academy +44 (0)203 553 1060 mail@adoptionacademy.co.uk
menu
  • Home
  • About us
    • Founder Gill Tree
    • Money back guarantee/Refund Policy
  • For Families
    • Post Adoption Support E-Courses
    • Building Resilience to Stress Less
    • Tackling the Turmoil
    • Solution Focused Therapy
    • Rhythmic Movement Training
    • Touching Stories;Massage And Metaphor
    • Therapeutic Parenting
    • Non-Violent Resistance
    • Recommended Reading
    • Adoption Support Fund
  • For Agencies
    • Post Adoption Support Services to Agencies
    • Adoption Support Funded Therapeutic Parenting Course
    • VideoBasedCoursesAndWebinars
    • Book Gill for Your Event
    • Resilience Retreat For Your Team
    • Case Study Medway Council
    • Case Study North London Consortium
    • Case Study South Glos Foster Carers
    • Case Study Bucks CC
    • Case Study Adoption UK
  • Media/Press/Articles
    • Articles
    • The Video Room
  • Blog
  • Get in Touch
    • Get in Touch
  • Login
    • Login to e-course
    • Login to my account
    • Login to affiliate area
    • Log out

We Are Not Broken Just Bent

Published on 27th February 2017

We're not broken just bent

I spent 2 years as a foster carer before I adopted my son in 2011. What struck me with looking after 9 children over that time was how resilient they were and how well they functioned in society considering the challenges they had had. I in no way want to diminish the neglect or abuse they had suffered. Nor am I saying that they dont have challenging behaviours. Many do. What I am saying it that these children in the words of this song by PINK are not broken just bent

Just give me a reason,
Just a little bit's enough
Just a second, we're not broken
Just bent we can learn to LOVE again.
Oh, it's in the stars,
It's been written in the scars on our hearts
We're NOT broken
Just bent we can learn to love again.

I truly believe that we colour the outcome of our interactions through our percerption, beliefs and attitudes. I recently met some adopters who attributed their childs behaviour to his genes thereby limiting him to him to a present and a future where it would be impossible to change. Whilst the jury is still out on this one, much behaviour is learnt not inherited.  Think of speaking a language. You tend to speak the language of the people you are surrounded by but this is not inherited.  Think of Pavlovs dogs. They learnt to salivate when a bell was rung because Pavlov had trained them to associate bell ringing with food. This is called conditioning and can be un-learnt. 

So next time you label your childs behaviour in your head (be it disruptive, manipulative, upsetting, controlling):

Stop and think about the positive intent behind it

notice whether you are interpreting it or perceiving it correctly and

think about how you can help your child adjust to realign them. They are not broken, just bent. 

 

View all messages

Free Trial No Commitment. No hidden fees. No credit card required. Start Today

Anatomy and physiology course online free trial demo
Enquire now
Download our
brochure

Newsletter Signup

Testimonials

"‘Excellent base knowledge of theory and practical suggestions to develop a sensory menu for our children. Will help to support carers in the work/care of LAC. Thank you, an enlightening training – very enjoyable’."

- Donna Conway – Therapeutic Practitioner -
adoption academy - money back guarantee

 

Footer

Social Media
Tweets by @GillTree
Useful Links
  • Terms & Conditions
  • Privacy Policy
  • Gill Tree Training
  • It's a Jungle out There
  • Gilltree.com

RSS feed

Get in Touch

GM Tree Training Ltd
5 Clumber Drive
Frome
Somerset BA11 2LG
United Kingdom
T: +44 (0)203 553 1060

Contact us

Accreditations

Member of the International Stress

Management Association 

 
Powered by WordPay

Mastercard Visa American Express Maestro JCB

Adoption Academy is the Trading Name of GM Tree Training Ltd

© 2021 GM Tree Training Ltd, All rights reserved