Do you need a blueprint for eradicating controlling behaviour and having more joy with your children?

Published on 3rd September 2022

Here’s the story of Lottie and Steve

The first thing Lottie said to me was “You’re our last hope”. The couple had gone through lots of other therapies and felt that Non-Violent Resistance was their last hope and were in fear of the adoption with their ten-year-old daughter breaking down. They would block their bedroom door at night as the daughter had threatened to kill them. It was clear that the family needed significant support, and we agreed on 26 hour long weekly sessions of mentoring from me.

In fact, this family finished the provision after 18 of the 26 sessions because they had been willing to try just about everything I suggested which completely turned the negative dynamic around. They had had a brilliant summer (school holidays were usually dreaded) and really didn’t need me any more. They were so grateful and so convinced by the programme that they made a recording talking about their experience, to share with other families. This can be heard here;

“Last year I think me and Steve were ready to split up and who knows what would have happened to our daughter. I think every family should have access to these tools”.

So, what did they do to create such change?

They followed a programme called Non-Violent Resistance with me, learning how to stay calm during escalations and not engage with the behaviour, they developed their relationship with Alex, they got friends and family to support them in the message “this has got to stop” they developed their authority. And above all else they stopped being scared of this little girl and her behaviour. The fear actually feeds the behaviour as it gives the child a sense of (fake) power than can be addictive.

Would that be of help to your situation?

Help is just a click away